Saturday, June 23, 2007

Letters, pictures, notes and ..........junk.

Yes, you may all now officially call me "Mrs. P. Rat" (P is for Pack)!

In our moving of an entire household, which has not been moved since 1982, we have:
- loaded up the trailer and taken it to the dump with "junk"
- several green garbage bags of clothes plus everything that didn't get sold at the garage sale (which includes MANY beautiful stuffed animals, tennis rackets, two-story cat house...aaahhemmmmm, dishes, shoes, 78 RPM records, long playing records of the 60's and 70's, etc. etc. etc. etc.) has been taken to our friendly "Value Village"
- many items of furniture picked up by our two favorite Congolese friends

AND I'm still looking at an ocean of boxes and more green garbage bags to take to our new place.

I'm thinking another garage sale when we get there.

Every drawer contains a letter or a picture or a little note.

I sat. I read. I remembered. A letter from a dear friend, "L", going through difficult times and how appreciative she was to husband and I..........for being her friend....for listening to her and encouraging her through her dark days.

I know all of you have those letters. The ones that mean a great deal to you, so you keep them.

I will continue to keep mine. I will re-read them and be reminded how important it is to befriend people in need. I will keep them as a remembrance of wonderful friendships and how those friendships continue today. Some day, someone, most likely one of my children, will find these letters and they will read them too. They will be encouraged to continue to befriend those in need.

I found love letters from my father to my mother while he was in Europe during WWar II. He left Canada a few months after they were married. Mom found out she was pregnant after he left for the war, before they could talk together, intimately, about their very first child. How difficult it was to live without him sharing this marvelous event, without him knowing his first child until nearly 3 years later.

I sat. I read. I thought about the generations before me, what life may have been like. Difficult times. Lonely times. Stressful times. There were letters my grandmother had sent to her son, my dad, while he was in the war. What must it have been like for a mother in those days.

Pictures too. Every one with a memory....hundreds of them.

Notes from my granddaughter......"I love you Grammy" they all said. Notes from son and daughter and husband........"You're the best Mom ever!"....."You're the best Mommy in the whole wide universe, and I love you!"........"Lovingly always.....I love you Dear".............I keep them all.

The memories of the house will be packed up with me when I go. Too many to write......

I pray for God's presence this next week. Lots to do. So little time. The letters, pictures and notes are all packed away for another season of my life..........perhaps another place too...........

May God go with us.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

A word from the bush.

I called son after work. He's laboring at Bible Camp. Getting it readied. Getting it spiffed-up and presentable. Cutting grass. Cutting grass. Watching it grow. Cutting it some more.

Of course, there are the "sightings" to make this wilderness time quite interesting. One day it was deer, the next it was moose. Several days he heard a thump-thump-thumppppppppp -thump-thump-thumppppppppppp. You guessed it. There was Mr. Bunny following his lady friend. When son heard the noise, he remembered the "Bambi" movie and Thumper, the rabbit, doing his thing with his hind foot. Interesting stuff...............

Son woke up yesterday morning to what he thought was someone at the door. He was quite surprised as there is no one around the camp yet, to visit him. He's presently, very much alone there. He went back to bed after a quick look out the window and found nothing. A little later, the same noise. This time when he got up to look, he saw a black bear on the path down from his cabin. He gave a shout and away it ran. After going down the path later, he found rabbit feet or at least what was left of them. Who said rabbit's feet were lucky. Poor bunny.

Another day he glanced at one of the cabins and saw a cougar. Husband says there are cougars in Riding Mountain National Park, so it most likely was one. It could have been Poor bunny's fate.

There were wasp nests to be rid of, a dock to put in and anchor (with the help of his buddies) and today it was the swimming out to put the rope around the swimming area.

Quite the job.

I've been praying for God to come to him in these days of solitude, for son to have ears to hear Him, and eyes to behold His glory. I believe my prayers are being answered. What better place to hear and see God than in His creation.

I just hope an elephant doesn't show up!

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Father's Day and it's chaos!

It's chaos because of enormous amounts of everything piled high everywhere.

That shouldn't make any difference to it being Father's Day though. It's just that it's kind of difficult celebrating when "things" are in the way.

Even though all is in turmoil and disarray, I can still tell husband that he's absolutely the most wonderful father in all of history. Yes, even with his shortcomings, which aren't many, I might add, he is head and shoulders above anyone else in all the world in the "Father" department.

He has always taken very keen interest in all things our children did and tried and thought and messed up and exceeded at. He not only took an interest, he took an active interest in their lives and still does today. He enjoys his kids. He wants the best for them. They look up to him too. They ask for his advice. They watch how he does things. They see him in his role as "Father".

There are days when he fails as a dad too.......like there are days I fail as a mom.

God watches over him. God teaches him lessons. God is his example of how to be a father.

I pray for him today because being a Father can be one whopping big job!

In fact, I pray for all fathers today. They have been given great responsibilities to act with all Godly wisdom on behalf of their families and in that, they need all the help they can get.

So, in the midst of our "house that is moving" - "HAPPY FATHER'S DAY" TO ALL YOU DADS!!!

Friday, June 15, 2007

Provision.

Yes, we now have a place to unpack TO. Our new digs will be on 21 street west. Nice, quaint, little house. A yard we can handle. Enough rooms to hopefully put some of our present furniture. The rest will have to go.

We DID want to downsize.

This happens to be the very same house which, in 1981, my parents house-sat one winter. We enjoyed coming to that house alot. Had a 40th wedding anniversary for them there too.....big celebration! Family pictures....minus son, who was not yet conceived. I found those family pictures too a few weeks back while sorting through drawers. Yes, there it was. Very same house where we will now live.

Our daughter, who was 4 at the time, remembers her Grandpa letting her bake in that kitchen. She said he allowed her to put as many ingredients in her bowl that she wanted! I think I kind of recall that episode............

Life is funny that way. Of all the houses in P.A. we would come back to that one. Besides the fact too, that there are barely any houses at all worth renting right now. But that particular one was available.

Yes, God provides. His love for us is never failing.

Thank you Lord, for your provision, in every way.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Emotions.

These days I'm mostly crying, sometimes laughing.

I'm wondering and I'm thinking.

I'm trying to stay rational.

I'm having too many strolls down memory lane.

I'm feeling excited about our future and imagining where God will take us.......not "the other side of the world" kind of take us, but what street in P.A. we'll be living on and what our new digs will look like.

Apartment? Duplex? Sod hut? Hole in the ground? Trailer?????

I'm tired.............from entering time cards at work and thinking about everything that must be done in the next few short weeks.....not to mention packing up 30 years of stuff.

Today.............was a very sad day. I guess that is what's bothering me the most. Our dear cats, Sukey, Chiang and Job were all taken to the vet. I can hardly stand being in this house now without them. Perhaps one day God will allow us to have pets again, I don't know. I loved them.

It's all just so difficult.

I want to crawl in a hole and plug my ears......and cry......and cry.

I'm just one huge ball of uncontrollable emotions.

I'm still believing in God's provision though, for everything.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Stop the world....I may want to get off!

It seems that everything in my life is totally out of my control these days.

I'm waiting. I'm watching. I'm looking in the paper for places for us to rent.

Daughter and family are moving away soon. We will be missing them.............

Son is presently in the midst of a huge storm with tornadic activity (according to Environment Canada) - by himself, with no means of communication, other than a calling card....I think.

The cats. Our dear sweet cats. Daughter and family will take Sukey, the girl, when they move.

The two boys, Chiang and Job..........rental places don't take to pets. Cats don't live well with new owners either, unless they know them.

As I said, it's all out of my hands. I'm crying more than I'm laughing these days.

I need you close God. I need to remember Jeremiah 29:"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future."

Goin' on 60 and I'm still learning huge lessons in trust.

You'd think I'd have it down pat by now, wouldn't you?

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Well, that didn't work out.

We didn't get chosen for the house we were wanting to rent. They said they found another couple who were willing to sign a rental agreement for a longer time period. That possibility didn't work out.

So, if you know of anyone who is willing to rent a house to two pretty good tenants, let us know, eh? We'll be looking again this week too.

I'm not worried. I'm thinking it's kind of like an adventure, waiting to see what God will provide for us. We're packing up to go...........we'll be waiting to see exactly where that will be.

Livin' on the edge can be exciting. Just not sure how thin that edge will get when it comes to June 29 and no place yet in sight.

I'm going to believe in God's unfailing provision. Period.

Saturday, June 9, 2007

We're outta' here!!!

Seems like these days people are in a moving mode. People I know are moving to different homes or different cities. Children are moving back from university. Some young people are taking up jobs in the middle of nowhere....that's right.....son is cleaning up at Covenant Heights Bible Camp for the summer..........as in maintenance man. That will be a good thing.

And husband and I are no different. We're joining the throngs of shakers and movers.

There are bags for the thrift store.
There are bags for friends who need stuff.
There are bags for garbage.
There are bags for recycled paper.
There are bags to be actually moved.......somewhere. As of this moment, we have sold our house, but don't yet know where we're going. Somewhere. I'm sure it will be somewhere.

But the more I pack up, the more embarrassed I become. How on earth did so much "stuff" get into this house? I really never thought myself to be a "pack-rat extra-ordinaire" . I have always left that illustrious title to husband. Alas, I find I have joined the ranks. I must confess, I have waaaaaaay too much of everything. That's what is embarrassing! So many people have so little. Here I am sitting in a sea of green garbage bags and cardboard boxes, getting higher as I type. Who needs 30 towels??!!!! A half dozen would do just fine. And crystal. Why I have water, juice, wine, beer, brandy, martini and various other shapes and sizes of glasses, I'll never know. We don't even drink brandy!!! or martini's for that matter!! Is that "Shaken....not stirred"?????? I don't even have a shaker for Pete's sake. I will keep those wine glasses though.

I do believe it is the right time to move......family home or not!!!! But I keep finding things. Things that I remember my mother having on her dresser when I was very, very small. Things that my father had given to my mother. A letter I received from the husband before we were married dated......January 6, 1965...........pictures of my younger brother in the summer of 1974, just before he died....and his shoes........and sports jacket. I kept things. Things I didn't want to let go. Things that allowed me to remember. I'm having to give them up now. That's hard. I have begun to cry several times but have given myself a talking to. Life is change. Period.

And, there is a season for everything.

But, it's final!! We're outta' here in a few short weeks, and may God provide for our every
N E E D........as in roof.

Thursday, June 7, 2007

People are important to me.

That's kind of an understatement I suppose, because I know that people actually are life to me. Even though I usually don't like huge crowds of folks around, I enjoy the fact that every person is a creation of the Father, one of his shaping and molding, and some of these created beings shape who I am and what I am.

Not just my husband and family either. I'm talking friends - some of whom I work with. I'm with them all day, hearing their stories, listening to them speak of their children or their circumstances in life, watching how they work at their jobs, and how different each one approaches life and home and work. I enjoy being a part of them, because everyone I have a relationship with, affect and change and become a part of me.

Strange isn't it.

Relationship.

Life is all about relationship. Remember the movie "Castaway" with Tom Hanks. Ya. We have it deep within us to have relationship, hopefully with another living being. Poor Tom was stuck with "Wilson" but, hey, that WAS just a movie after all. Nevertheless, it portrayed man's true instinct to be in relationship......with something, even if it is a soccer ball!

I believe it's God who has put that desire for relationship within us. A desire to know others, sometimes deeply and more importantly, a desire to know God more fully.

Invariably, we try various combinations of things during our lives, to help satisfy the longings within us, but what are those longings........are they for people.........or alcohol...........or sex........ or drugs....or power......or more of this and that or being the best at this or that? What?????

In the end, I'm finding, it's all about God and His desire to be in relationship with us.

He calls. Sometimes we hear. Other times we don't. But you know, the older I get, the more clear things become. I'm finding the closer He gets, the better I hear.......and see.........and understand............Him.

The relationship happens with communication. Talking. Listening. Hearing. Waiting.

Waiting on God.

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Gate Crashers.

Our church has a prayer time every Wednesday morning at 6:30.

Those of us who come, ask how each other is doing. We chat for a time.

God hears our chattings. He hears our inner thoughts too, when we don't want to talk out loud about them.

For that hour, God becomes another member of the group, sitting and listening, encouraging, offering peace and wholeness to a sometimes bedraggled and tired group of seekers.

We take specific time to let Him know of our concerns.....for those who are sick; for those who haven't been able to find Him - yet; for the Body at Gateway; for those who are lonely and lost; for those who can't get beyond their grief......and sometimes we just talk to Him about ourselves and our families.

There are times of lament....others of praise.........all to a God who desires us to be in relationship with Him.

We come.................and we crash against heaven's gates.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Being led by my Father's hand.

It's a few days now since our Relay for Life cancer walk, but from the moment I arrived back home from that walk my life has been a whirlwind.

Driving home from the Relay, Saturday morning, my husband announced that we most likely have sold our home. We had wanted to sell for the past 4 years or more but something always prevented us from going ahead with the sale.

The home I was raised in. Other than the first years of our marriage, this has been home to me. Now it will belong to another family.....when the mortgage for them is approved, of course.

It's kind of like handing off the baton like we did at the Relay for Life walk. Everyone keeps on going, one person being handed the baton to represent their team....but someone always walking. We will hand off our home to others who will enjoy this place. We will pack up our own precious memories, take them with us and keep on going elsewhere, but they will make their own memories here.

The first day was difficult. We hesitated, changed our minds, wondered if what we were doing was God's will for us. We remembered of course, that this is what we had asked God to do for us, to find someone who would enjoy our home like we had................ and now it was happening. Were we willing to follow Him in all of this.

The second day was just as horrific. It gave me one great huge migraine. It literally made me sick. Things happened that day and the next, leaving us to wonder again if we were doing the right thing. At one point we called the buyers to say we had changed our minds because we had found out our house really was worth quite a bit more than we had said we would sell it for....but, a hand was shaken, a promise was made. How could we go back on our word and expect God to show us his faithfulness. We kept our promise to the people and stayed with the agreed price.

After that decision, a great peace fell upon me. You know, the kind that passes all understanding. Ya, like that.

Today, I have no idea where we will be in a month, perhaps renting a house, I don't know. But I do know that the peace is with me and I know I'm being led by my Father's hand. It's into the unknown, but I'm holding on tight.

As the week progresses, I'll let you know where he has taken us.

I'm beginning to feel like a pilgrim of sorts like the great old hymn:
Guide me, Oh Thou great Jehovah
Pilgrim through this barren land,
I am week but Thou art mighty
Hold me with Thy powerful hand.
Bread of Heaven, Bread of Heaven
Feed me 'til I want no more,
Feed me 'til I want no more.

I'm holding on Father......and I'm smiling.

Saturday, June 2, 2007

See, I told you!!!

Here we are, in all our.....glory??!! This is the group of hearty souls who walked all evening and into the night, finishing as the sun rose on the day......in 3rd place!!! Great team effort!

Our Relay for Life team from the Sask Environment Forest Service "Studs &Peelers" worked hard throughout the entire year, raising money for cancer research. Under the committed and sometimes bold leadership of our captain Val, we raised close to $7,000.

Congratulations to the young folks at Carlton Comprehensive High School in Prince Albert, who won first place, raising just over $16,000.!!!!! And who says young people these days have no vision and drive!!??? The Canadian Cancer Society appreciates you......as do we!!!

I enjoy giving up some time and energy to be a part of this team. We work well together. We're already working on plans for the coming year and it looks like it may be just as exciting as this one.

Think calendar..........................oh, ya........................